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Home › Articles › Holiday: Winter › It's Your Inner Brat

It's Your Inner Brat

Why New Year's Resolutions Fizzle

By Pauline Wallin, Ph.D.

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Are you determined to make your New Year's resolutions really stick this time? Be prepared for a challenge. On Jan. 2 millions of people are going to promise themselves they will lose weight, quit smoking or drinking, get more exercise or spend less money. Unfortunately by Feb. 2, most of them will have given up.

And it's all due to the "inner brat." Everyone has an inner brat. It's a carryover from early childhood, a little voice in the back of your mind that still acts like a 2-year-old. It wants what it wants, and it wants it now. It not only wants it, it feels entitled to have it. It also hates exerting itself. When things aren't perfect, the inner brat blames someone else or the situation.

Indulging Self
The inner brat has really enjoyed the holidays – it lives for self-indulgence. The first few days of your resolution aren't really that hard. After all, you may be so sick of all that rich holiday food by now that even your inner brat doesn't miss it. And since many people around you are tackling their own self-improvement programs, you feel some social support to put more self-discipline in your life.

However, a couple of weeks into the new discipline, your appetite has returned, and you start to feel deprived. It is at this point that you are most at risk for reverting back to old behaviors thanks to your inner brat. It will talk to you in the back of your mind, trying to convince you to indulge it with tactics such as:

  • Nagging: "I really need that cigarette," or "I can't live without that cookie."
  • Magnifying discomfort and inconvenience: "I can't stand being hungry," or "It's too hard to get up early to exercise."
  • Rationalizing: "One cigarette isn't going to kill me," or "It's too cold (or too snowy) to go for a walk," or "If I charge this on my credit card, it will only raise my monthly payments by $10."
  • Flattering: "Think for yourself. Don't let anybody tell you what to eat or not to eat," or "You're a nice guy. So what if you drink a little?"
  • False promises: "I'll work on it this weekend," or "I'll start my diet on Monday," or "This is my last drink."
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